I love how we spend all of our lives trying to figure out what God's plan is when oftentimes, He sends little clues to show us what we're supposed to do with our lives.
Take this morning for example. I woke up at like 9 and worked on a new song I'm learning on the piano. I then cooked bacon and eggs for my sister and I. I know most people wouldn't do this, but I worked on Spanish a bit. Then I sat down, ate my breakfast, and decided to do some blogging while I have time to kill. After this, I'm going to study the Bible for a bit, then go for a walk and go swimming. After that it's homework time, and then I tutor this afternoon.
These actions sound pretty normal. But if you look at each action I did, there's a thought. If you look behind each thought I was having as I did those actions, it revealed the desires I have on my heart. Let's look and see.
Working on song for piano-Well, this song was actually a Taylor Swift song that I've been relating to lately haha. But usually when I play piano I play worship songs or old hymns to help me worship God. I know that even though it's the hardest thing I have to do, I have to love God with my actions and let love not just be a song I play on the piano.
Cooking breakfast-I love to cook and I wish I was able to do it more. When I was cooking breakfast for two, I was imagining what it'll be like to cook for my husband one day. I know that God has put this desire on my heart to get married.
Spanish-Um I am absolutely crazy because I don't know many people who would speak Spanish aloud to themselves just to practice it and refresh their minds of old vocabulary??? But I know that God has put Spanish on my heart for a reason. I want to teach it to high school students one day, spend time overseas for at least a semester, and do translation work for people in the US. I also want to teach English as a Second Language.
Blogging-I like to write and talk about things I've learned in life. I always have a story to tell. I hope that one day I can use my life experiences to help people and teach people.
Bible-This is simple. I need God and to read about what He has to teach me that day. I've heard it like this: B.asic I.nstructions B.efore L.eaving E.arth.
Exercise-I love to walk and swim because it's fun! I'm trying to get in shape and lose a bit of the Freshman 15, so it's a great way to do it. When I exercise, I think about life. For some reason, when I walk I start daydreaming about living overseas in somewhere like Guatemala where I'd have to do a lot of walking..and that makes me really excited!
Homework-When I do my homework, I think about just getting it over with ha! But in my heart, I know that by taking these courses for my degree, I'm one step closer to being a teacher and that makes me excited.
Tutoring-I love my job as a tutor for my college's foreign language lab and also as a private tutor for high school students. I've gotten to where I look forward to this job. When I do this, I think about how I cannot wait to be a teacher one day and how I can make hard material easier to understand.
All of these little actions I do on a random day like Tuesday have thoughts that I think as I do each thing. If you look at all of my thoughts, you can see the desires I have on my heart. These show me what God wants me to do with my life-be a Spanish teacher, spend some time overseas, encouraging people, more than likely teenagers, getting married, and more. If you don't know what you want to do with your life, just look at the little things you do each day and what you're thinking as you do them. You can find your desires in no time :)
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Monday, May 30, 2011
Dreams
Ahh. It's Memorial Day, which means I didn't have to work today! While I love my job (I work with the foreign language department at my college as a student tutor) I also love to relax. Today I went for a walk, went swimming, and laid out in the sun. I did some writing, both on this blog and also on a poem I'm working on for my creative writing class. I talked to some old friends and one of the younger girls I mentor in my church. I topped it all off by eating Zaxby's with my sister and her boyfriend. Some good stuff really! I'm now listening to Casting Crowns and thinking about life and God's purpose for me here. There are some things that I'd like to do before I die. I know that this is totally random but I just kinda want to talk about them. They are (in no particular order):
1. Work with teenagers in a church setting. I want to hang out with them, teach them, and encourage them to fall in love with Jesus Christ. I'd love to either marry a youth pastor, be a youth pastor myself, or just work with teenagers. I especially want to work with middle school girls. I think that God put this passion on my heart from getting bullied as a young teenager, then becoming a Christian at age 14 and seeing how much God loved me. Plus, teenagers are just awesome in general!
2. Marry the right person. I want to fall in love with a man who will love God with all of his heart, soul and mind and love me second. I'm still in the process of deciding what I'd like him to be like (this is what dating is for!) but him loving God wholeheartedly and loving me second is a must. Some other things I believe I'd like are a sense of humor/mischief, an ability to carry intellectual conversations with me, a natural love of people, an ability to make people feel welcome and loved, and easy to talk to.
3. Have kids. I want to have a big family and adopt kids if possible. I also want to have people over at my home a lot.
4. Teach high school Spanish and possibly religion. I know that I love to teach other people about other cultures. I love teaching Spanish and I hope to be able to get high school students excited about it, too. I also want people to understand other faiths and why they believe in their own.
5. Spend time overseas, preferably doing mission work. I love other countries and I'd love to live in one for a while, be it a semester, a year, or several years. I also love telling people about my Savior and I'd love to tell people how Jesus can change your life. I'd love to teach English overseas too or work at an orphanage.
6. Use my love of creative arts for God's glory. I love to write and do skits. I'd love to use my writing to glorify God one day and maybe organize a drama ministry in my future church. I also love to play piano.
We'll see where God takes me! As for the moment, He's taking me to the bathroom to scrub the toilet and to do some other fun activities. Hasta luego!
1. Work with teenagers in a church setting. I want to hang out with them, teach them, and encourage them to fall in love with Jesus Christ. I'd love to either marry a youth pastor, be a youth pastor myself, or just work with teenagers. I especially want to work with middle school girls. I think that God put this passion on my heart from getting bullied as a young teenager, then becoming a Christian at age 14 and seeing how much God loved me. Plus, teenagers are just awesome in general!
2. Marry the right person. I want to fall in love with a man who will love God with all of his heart, soul and mind and love me second. I'm still in the process of deciding what I'd like him to be like (this is what dating is for!) but him loving God wholeheartedly and loving me second is a must. Some other things I believe I'd like are a sense of humor/mischief, an ability to carry intellectual conversations with me, a natural love of people, an ability to make people feel welcome and loved, and easy to talk to.
3. Have kids. I want to have a big family and adopt kids if possible. I also want to have people over at my home a lot.
4. Teach high school Spanish and possibly religion. I know that I love to teach other people about other cultures. I love teaching Spanish and I hope to be able to get high school students excited about it, too. I also want people to understand other faiths and why they believe in their own.
5. Spend time overseas, preferably doing mission work. I love other countries and I'd love to live in one for a while, be it a semester, a year, or several years. I also love telling people about my Savior and I'd love to tell people how Jesus can change your life. I'd love to teach English overseas too or work at an orphanage.
6. Use my love of creative arts for God's glory. I love to write and do skits. I'd love to use my writing to glorify God one day and maybe organize a drama ministry in my future church. I also love to play piano.
We'll see where God takes me! As for the moment, He's taking me to the bathroom to scrub the toilet and to do some other fun activities. Hasta luego!
Refuge
My oh my has it been a long time since I've written here! So much has happened in my life since then, which gives me a great opportunity to write this blog. Maybe I'll actually start posting in it again :)
I guess I'll share this much. My grandma, who was like a second mom to me, passed away the day after Thanksgiving after a three-year fight with cancer took its turn for the worst unexpectedly. I miss her a lot. On another note, I've had a few guys in my life since then. Some were in my life for a few dates, others were in my life for several months. However, it's almost June and nothing ever worked out, as you can see by my Facebook relationship status haha.Those experiences helped me grow a lot in my search for looking for God's Mr. Right. Let's see.. I got accepted to Florida State University in the fall so in two months I'll be moving from my small hometown and my now familiar college, Florida State College at Jacksonville to my own apartment in Tallahassee! My mom is horrified by this thought, as my sister (who is now a Seminole and my future roommate too woot woot!) and I will be two hours away from home. Personally, I'm rather excited about leaving the nest, but that's another story....:) This part is probably the hardest part for me to mention, but on April 6 on my way to FSCJ I was in a really bad car accident that totaled my car. I was told later that I should have died in this accident. It was a terrible thing to go through and I still don't have a car. But...I know that God was taking care of me and I'm going to praise Him for keeping me alive that day. I'm sitting here in my pj's on Memorial Day weekend. I have Facebook opened and I just drank an amazing cup of tea. As I look on all of the things I've been through in the past seven months or so, I realize something.
Have you ever lost someone you loved to cancer who helped raise you and watch that person die in a hospital bed? Do you know what it's like to be driving on your morning commute, realize that you didn't see another car coming, and hear the smashes, smell the burning metal, and feel blood pour from your face as you realize you've been in a terrible car accident one random morning? Have you ever been left by someone you loved, be it a significant other, a friend, or often times, both, and wonder if the feelings they expressed for you were ever genuine to begin with? When you go through these things, it feels like your world is falling apart. The ground you were once standing on is crashing in. Your options are to find something new to stand on or to fall. I think that's why when people go through bad times like I have in the past several months do certain things because they've lost what was holding them together in life and so they search for new foundations. They find this in something that will make them happy for a little while, like sex, drugs, drinking, shopping, eating, the list goes on and on. Sometimes they throw themselves into things that will bring them success or at least get their mind off of things, like work, new hobbies, whatever. But in the end of the day, these new foundations will fall apart, too, and once more you'll be without a foundation to stand on.When our world falls apart, or even before it falls apart, our foundations have to be in something that won't change. That is in God and a relationship with Him. God is the only thing that won't change or abandon you for someone else. It's not just a belief in God though; it's a relationship with Him. It's knowing that because He sent Jesus to save us from our own mistakes, He loves us enough to die for someone who doesn't even love Him back. It's knowing that because Jesus died for us, if we believe this wholeheartedly we are made faultless in God's eyes. With that knowledge in mind, a relationship with God is studying the Bible and realizing God's plans and instructions for our lives. It's praying and realizing that God is listening. It's sitting quietly and waiting for what God has to say to you. It's treating other people differently because you know that God wants you to and that He loves everyone, so you should too. It's being so overwhelmed by what God is doing in your life that you have to tell other people what He's done in your life. A relationship with God is like no other, and it's the only foundation I have in my life that I can stand 100% on. It's the only thing that's gotten me through these past few months.
The thing that just frustrates me is that if a girl's boyfriend broke up with her, we would probably tell her "Let's go to the club and get wasted, and maybe we can get a few numbers of someone out there." That's only going to hurt her worse in the end, because that foundation she is building with alcohol and guys is going to come crashing down again, too, and she'll be falling again. We never tell her, "Here, why don't you spend time with God and pray about all of the pain you're going through?" No, God is the butt of jokes, a patriotic gesture in a presidential speech, but never a remedy. I find it ironic that we push away the only thing that can really help us. Perhaps that's why there are so many people hurting today.
With that being said, it's time for breakfast/lunch and a chance to talk to my Creator about some stuff that's ticking me off :) See y'all later!
I guess I'll share this much. My grandma, who was like a second mom to me, passed away the day after Thanksgiving after a three-year fight with cancer took its turn for the worst unexpectedly. I miss her a lot. On another note, I've had a few guys in my life since then. Some were in my life for a few dates, others were in my life for several months. However, it's almost June and nothing ever worked out, as you can see by my Facebook relationship status haha.Those experiences helped me grow a lot in my search for looking for God's Mr. Right. Let's see.. I got accepted to Florida State University in the fall so in two months I'll be moving from my small hometown and my now familiar college, Florida State College at Jacksonville to my own apartment in Tallahassee! My mom is horrified by this thought, as my sister (who is now a Seminole and my future roommate too woot woot!) and I will be two hours away from home. Personally, I'm rather excited about leaving the nest, but that's another story....:) This part is probably the hardest part for me to mention, but on April 6 on my way to FSCJ I was in a really bad car accident that totaled my car. I was told later that I should have died in this accident. It was a terrible thing to go through and I still don't have a car. But...I know that God was taking care of me and I'm going to praise Him for keeping me alive that day. I'm sitting here in my pj's on Memorial Day weekend. I have Facebook opened and I just drank an amazing cup of tea. As I look on all of the things I've been through in the past seven months or so, I realize something.
Have you ever lost someone you loved to cancer who helped raise you and watch that person die in a hospital bed? Do you know what it's like to be driving on your morning commute, realize that you didn't see another car coming, and hear the smashes, smell the burning metal, and feel blood pour from your face as you realize you've been in a terrible car accident one random morning? Have you ever been left by someone you loved, be it a significant other, a friend, or often times, both, and wonder if the feelings they expressed for you were ever genuine to begin with? When you go through these things, it feels like your world is falling apart. The ground you were once standing on is crashing in. Your options are to find something new to stand on or to fall. I think that's why when people go through bad times like I have in the past several months do certain things because they've lost what was holding them together in life and so they search for new foundations. They find this in something that will make them happy for a little while, like sex, drugs, drinking, shopping, eating, the list goes on and on. Sometimes they throw themselves into things that will bring them success or at least get their mind off of things, like work, new hobbies, whatever. But in the end of the day, these new foundations will fall apart, too, and once more you'll be without a foundation to stand on.When our world falls apart, or even before it falls apart, our foundations have to be in something that won't change. That is in God and a relationship with Him. God is the only thing that won't change or abandon you for someone else. It's not just a belief in God though; it's a relationship with Him. It's knowing that because He sent Jesus to save us from our own mistakes, He loves us enough to die for someone who doesn't even love Him back. It's knowing that because Jesus died for us, if we believe this wholeheartedly we are made faultless in God's eyes. With that knowledge in mind, a relationship with God is studying the Bible and realizing God's plans and instructions for our lives. It's praying and realizing that God is listening. It's sitting quietly and waiting for what God has to say to you. It's treating other people differently because you know that God wants you to and that He loves everyone, so you should too. It's being so overwhelmed by what God is doing in your life that you have to tell other people what He's done in your life. A relationship with God is like no other, and it's the only foundation I have in my life that I can stand 100% on. It's the only thing that's gotten me through these past few months.
The thing that just frustrates me is that if a girl's boyfriend broke up with her, we would probably tell her "Let's go to the club and get wasted, and maybe we can get a few numbers of someone out there." That's only going to hurt her worse in the end, because that foundation she is building with alcohol and guys is going to come crashing down again, too, and she'll be falling again. We never tell her, "Here, why don't you spend time with God and pray about all of the pain you're going through?" No, God is the butt of jokes, a patriotic gesture in a presidential speech, but never a remedy. I find it ironic that we push away the only thing that can really help us. Perhaps that's why there are so many people hurting today.
With that being said, it's time for breakfast/lunch and a chance to talk to my Creator about some stuff that's ticking me off :) See y'all later!
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